Through the Eyes of the Meek
by Marauder52611
Summary: Before and after the Harry Potter story through the eyes of someone very unexpected.
1. Prologue

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything except everything in my room, and I seriously doubt that the rights to any fandom (except those that I create) would be in my room. -Marauder52611**

**(I know I usually forget disclaimers, but I will most likely randomly stick in a chapter in all my stories stating a disclaimer.)**

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I sit at the breakfast table drinking some tea and occasionally glancing at the newspaper that lay across from me. My husband's face glared at me from the front page, I didn't need to worry about him anymore. He had died and left my son and I alone. It was such a shame that it had to come to this, he was a nice person when we were younger. "Do you think that working with the aurors might clear our family name?" My son asked as he entered the room. I didn't bother asking, we both knew the answer anyway. Maybe someday, our surname will be restored to its former glory and position. For now, my son would have to keep working his way around the mistakes of his father and continue his struggle to rise in the political world. The only reason we are not in Azkaban would be the fact that the Potter boy vouched for us. He remembers the concern I had for my son, the concern that had indirectly saved Harry Potter's life. It makes no difference to me, I have already suffered much in my childhood. My son, however, is still young and has a long way before he grows old. His childhood was a luxury that I only wish I had, not that I was poor. Far from it actually, if you knew my maiden name you would hardly believe my statements. That name was given up long ago though, I hope to never use it again. It has done no good for anyone in my generation. I am nearly the sole survivor, except for my sister. SHe gave up the right to be my sister when she ran off and got disowned. She left me with our elder sister and that was the worst mistake anyone could have ever made. My childhood, however terrible, could have been worse. "Mum, I'm off to work!" "Have a good day, dear." Enjoy what you can, son. Your father may be dead, but he always finds a way to torment me. Even before I met him, he was ruining my life. My whole family was, they ruined my life and left me with nothing. I carried my now empty tea cup and flicked my wand at the _Daily Prophet_. It was soon nothing but shreds, but even now that face haunts me. The clock chimed and I ran to my bedroom, hoping to finally be alone with my thoughts. Hoping that someday, I will have a chance at freedom again. I tossed it away when I needed it most, and look where it got me. A widow, living in near poverty with her 21 year old son. If only I had taken my chance, if only I had done something selfish.


	2. Sortings and Other Sad Memories

**This chapter starts in ****_the woman_****'s fifth year. I don't have much else to say except that I will probably be not updating this fast later on. I don't own Harry Potter, or any of its characters. I own my ideas, and my OCs(There are no OCs in this story). -Marauder52611**

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No one expects me to want to be different, no one bothers. They all pressurize me into being their perfect little princess that I don't even have a moment to think about what I want. Living the life as the youngest in a strict family is hard enough without having all their hopes piled on you because you are the only one who doesn't know what to do. I know I'll never be brave like my cousin, but I can entertain myself by thinking about a scenario where I was. A dream in which I'm not this shy and meek and stupid girl who'll be pushed around for the rest of her life. Sometimes I picture it in my head, everyone gathered at dinner and I stand up. I push over the table and run out of the house, no one follows. They leave me alone, so does Lucius. I still cannot accept that I am to be married to him in less than 2 years! It's clear that after the wedding, I will lose whatever chance I have, at the moment, of being free. In 2 years I will be shoved inside a prison, no matter how spacious or lavish it is. A place where bravery is merely a dream, a place where my child, no matter the gender, will grow up in chains. Forced to become a follower of the Dark Lord, having no choice in any matter because of my mistakes. I'll be the mother who tells lies to protect her child when the pain and harshness becomes just too much. The mother, who even with all her strength cannot overcome her obstacles. My child will grow up asking why life has to be like this, why life is unfair. I cannot afford to think like this though. If anyone found out, I would lose everything. Just like Sirius, my parents would despise me. It hasn't even been a year, yet he has already been disowned. I don't even have a chance to change my mind, I'm already a 5th year Slytherin. I can still remember what that hat said those many years ago...

_I walked up to the hat, my sisters watching me closely. The second he hat touched my head I heard chuckling. "Unlike your family I see, some uneasiness about Slytherin, but no matter. You'll be out of that soon enough, after all even Bellatrix Black had her doubts about Slytherin." 'What if I don't want to be in Slytherin?' "You girl, you don't know what you want! Though if you think you can handle it, I can put you in Gryffindor or such. But think about your parents, girl. They would think you despicable, you would have no friends or life. You would be alone, no one to help you. It is your choice though. I may take your choice into account, but you lack the bravery for Gryffindor, the brains for Ravenclaw, and I doubt you, who has grown up hearing about the stupidity of Hufflepuff would want to go there. It is actually quite a fine house, I don't understand why nobody like them all that much." 'Why am I not brave enough for Gryffindor?' "You believe me to be wrong? Me who has sat on a shelf and sorted over a thousand students, who has conducted the very first sorting, and who has existed from before Hogwarts even if I had not been alive at the time. Never in my life have I been wrong about a sorting! Never, with your doubts there is only one pale where you won't prosper but you will have a life. No matter how lowly it will be. You belong in 'Slytherin!' Good luck, child. You will need it, you're too different already." I walked to the table that had erupted in cheers at gaining another member of my family. Another innocent child will be ruined, my chance for freedom is gone._

Such daunting thoughts for an 11-year-old, right? This is actually nothing compared to what goes through my elder sister's head, she's only 3 years older than me and has already begun training to join the Dark Lord. I'm going off track though, my life has become a horror both in school and at home. The only comfort I have is that they will not teach me the Unforgivable Curses, they believe that Lucius will protect me and that I have no need to become an active death eater like my sister. That is the solitary reason I am still sane, but sometimes I wonder what my life would be like without magic. Anyways, the fact that my cousin got into Gryffindor caused quite a lot of trouble in the family. Now everything falls to my youngest cousin's shoulders. He, who is not even 10 yet, will be forced to comply with their every dream for the family. I know how that feels, yet I also know how my older cousin feels. I remember his sorting well, which is good as it happened at the beginning of this school year.

_My cousin entered with all the other first years, looking around in awe. I wondered if I looked so small and vulnerable at one time. He was nervous, but after he started conversing with another boy he seemed to relax a bit. The sorting began, and Professor McGonagall called my cousin up. The last thing I could see was him attempting a small reassuring grin to another first year in the crowd. His sorting took about 2 minutes, not immediate yet not the longest sorting to happen(which held a record at 25 minutes, imagine that!). THe hat called,"Gryffindor!" I was not as shocked as I should have been, he had always been the black sheep of the family. He seemed a bit gloomy and glanced over at me, I gave him a small smile. Immediately he cheered up and skipped, I can't believe he skipped, to the silent table. There was no cheering or clapping, until one first year boy, the one my cousin was speaking to before, took the lead and began cheering. The Gryffindor table hesitantly began cheering as well, and my cousin had slumped down in his seat, finally at ease._

He had his chance of freedom, and he had taken it. Unlike myself, who lost the chance long ago. Occasionally, I can remember him glancing at me for approval. When we were very young, I was 7 and he was 3, then he would enjoy playing with me. As I was the closest cousin who was older than him, he would always be the most daring. I would try to rein him in. That all stopped when I became 9 and was told about my engagement to Lucius Malfoy. From that day on, my elder sister took acre of my cousin while I stayed holed up in my room. That was my only act of defiance, the only time I had ever physically defied them, and it felt amazing. Knowing that they can't control me made me feel as if I could finally escape, but then they go and drag me out of the room. They cursed and hexed me, nothing serious but I was merely 9. I couldn't stand the pain of those jinxes and I was never able to defy them again. The reminder of pain stopped me. Yet that is beside the point, when my cousin looked at me for a second there, it reminded me of better times. When we were younger and everything was simpler. How I miss those days, the days where marriage was a dream that was like a fairytale. After every child in my family turns 9, then they are told of their betrothal and are of age to have spells used on them. I miss the time when I was 7, when my cousin would look up to my and not my elder sister. When my eldest sister was friendly and not insane, I think she went insane because of how many spells my parents had cast on her when she was of age for them. Anyways, back to the previous subject. It is true that I told my cousin's parents that he was in Gryffindor, but in my defence they would have found out anyway. It was better sooner than later, as if it was later, their anger might be too much to handle. It was a large mistake though, after I told them they had come to Hogwarts. They tried to put my cousin in Slytherin themselves, but he refused. My aunt stopped talking to him after that, and he has given me the cold shoulder and silent treatment since. I don't think he will ever forgive me but I can hope, which is why I don't even attempt to stop him from playing his petty pranks on me and all the other Sytherins. I hold on to the small sliver of hope, that someday he will forgive me for this. Someday, he will forgive me for speeding up his life.


End file.
